The Book of Proverbs
Study #9: Accountability
August 22, 2004
Jim Bordwine, ThD
Introduction

If you really want to know what kind of character you have, consider how you respond when you receive reproof. At no point in our lives on this earth are we free from one or more relationships in which we are accountable for our character and conduct. Since this is true, how we respond to accountability (reproof, correction, instruction, and rebuke) says much about us. If we are being held accountable rightly, we will inevitably face those times when we are challenged regarding some element in our lives. This is when we see what kind of people we really are; this is when our claims are shown to be true or false.

Solomon addresses the issue of accountability from a number of perspectives. Normally, when we think of accountability, we're going to think of some official relationship in which someone has authority over us. This is part of what Solomon covers, but as his words are going to show, this subject of accountability has many aspects to it. He speaks of accountability, for example, in terms of receiving counsel from others, in terms of how we react to God's chastisement, and how children view the instruction of their parents. Because accountability is so fundamental to our lives and shows up in so many ways, Solomon also, as you would expect, speaks of the value of being accountable. Specifically, he speaks of the benefits that come to us when we are willing to receive the counsel of others in our desire to be held accountable.

Our Memory Verse

Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge,

but he who hates reproof is stupid.

(Pro. 12:1)

Here is one of those "black and white" declarations from Solomon. You are or you aren't; you do or you don't. Using antithetical parallelism, Solomon presents two kinds of people, as he so often does. First, there is the person who loves discipline; and if you love discipline, Solomon says, you love knowledge. His point is that knowledge, which is always desirable among those who are created by the One with all knowledge, comes through discipline. You can be knowledgeable without discipline; one of the fruits of discipline is knowledge--this could be said in a variety of ways, but the implication is that there is a connection between knowledge and discipline.

For our purposes, what is so significant about this verse is that word "discipline." This term (muwcar) means "instruction, correction, doctrine, chastening." So, using those definitions, listen to Solomon again: "Whoever loves instruction love knowledge" or "whoever loves correction loves knowledge" or "whoever loves doctrine loves knowledge" or "whoever loves chastening love knowledge." All of these words refer to the same basic idea and that is the idea of having your conduct challenged. This is the heart of accountability. It has to do with receiving input from others regarding how we are behaving or what attitudes we are exhibiting.

That word "knowledge" (daath), by the way, refers to "discernment, wisdom, understanding." Think about what Solomon is saying. He is teaching that if you welcome correction or instruction, you will gain knowledge; if you want to excel in understanding or if you want to be a discerning person or if you want to be a wise person, you will be willing to receive counsel. The correction or counsel given to us by others is one of the key requirements for becoming a wise person, according to the book of Proverbs. The opposite, therefore, can be said: without correction or instruction or counsel, you will not grow in discernment and wisdom. This is what much of our lives is about--it is about being corrected, about learning, about hearing instruction and putting that instruction into action. This process starts when we are children and continues for everyone of us until the day we leave this earth.

Notice the second phrase of this verse: "but he who hates reproof is stupid." There is support for our interpretation thus far. Solomon contrasts the man who loves discipline and seeks discernment through discipline to the man who simply hates reproof. And that word (towkechah) means "rebuke, correction, chastisement, chiding." Solomon draws a direct comparison here. One man welcomes rebuke or counsel or instruction because he understands the value of it. Another man won't hear rebuke or counsel or instruction because he doesn't value it. In fact, Solomon labels him as "stupid." This term (baar) means "brutish, foolish." The man who hates to be corrected or will not receive counsel or thinks he has no need of instruction is like a beast--he has no discernment, but thinks he has all he needs; he has no understanding, but thinks he understands everything.

This verse speaks plainly to us about the basic matter of accountability. Solomon's words tell us that this is a need in us--he emphasizes the value of receiving instruction or discipline and he does that because we need it. We are not naturally discerning or naturally wise. In fact, we are the opposite because of our fallen natures. Therefore, we have to learn how to be discerning and we have to gain wisdom. And one highly significant source of discernment and wisdom is the reproof of others. That we need reproof is not the question; the question is: will we seek it and receive it?

With this general introduction to the importance of accountability, let's consider some other passages.

Additional Verses

My son, do not reject the discipline of the Lord or loathe his reproof,

for whom the lord loves he reproves, even as a father corrects the son

in whom he delights. (Pro. 3:11, 12)

Remember that when we speak of the issue of accountability, we are talking about receiving correction for our conduct or thinking. These verses present to us an essential element in this study. Solomon teaches that discipline (again, remember that this word means such things as "correction, instruction, doctrine, chastening") is something to be desired because, in this case, it is evidence of God's love for us. This raises the matter of accountability above the arena of human relationships and teaches us that it really is a matter that originates in God.

A son should value and long for correction from God because such discipline is one of the ways in which God manifests His regard for us. Instead of letting us go our own way, He corrects us; instead of letting us hold foolish and harmful opinions, He reproves us. This is what God does for us because He loves us. When God holds us accountable, therefore, we should welcome it. Remembering the previous verse, if we recognize our need as fallen creatures, we will embrace and be thankful for God's reproof (as with the word "discipline," the word translated "reproof" here is the same as in 12:1).

Solomon provides a point of reference for his son by saying that this is how an earthly father treats a son "in whom he delights." A father is going to discipline his son and give reproof when necessary--not because he wants to "bug" his son or make life miserable for him, but because he loves his son and wants to deliver him from the traps that await bad judgment and bad convictions. Here, then, is one of those uniquely Biblical concepts: true love manifests itself in correction, not license. The first time a child turns to a parent and says something like "you don't love me because you're always telling me what to do and you're always pointing out my faults," that's the opportunity for some truly meaningful contact. Parents should never let a child get away with that kind of twisted thinking. That is a prime example of the need for correction. They don't know the truth and you need to give them the truth--and keep giving it to them until they understand it.

And this isn't only about parents and children, of course. In all of our relationships, to correct is to love; to rebuke is to love; to give that uncomfortable word of admonishment is to love.

He is on the path of life who heeds instruction,

but he who ignores reproof goes astray.

(Pro. 10:17)

Related to what the verses we just considered is this proverb. Briefly, Solomon emphasizes the outcome of being a person open to accountability versus being a person who does not receive counsel. Look at the high value placed on the former position: "he is on the path of life who needs instruction." The word rendered "instruction" is the same one we've seen before. It means "correction, discipline, doctrine, chastening." Here, Solomon commends the one who "heeds" such input. This word (shamar) is simple and it means "to keep, to guard, to protect." This isn't hard to understand. What do you keep or guard or protect? You keep, guard and protect that which is valuable to you and that which you consider worth having and preserving. Solomon says you should feel this way about instruction. When you are corrected, when you are discipline, you should count it as a blessing because it will keep you on the right path and keep you from suffering the fates of fools.

Solomon, in fact, mentions the other kind of person, the kind of person who does not consider instruction or discipline something to be guarded: "but he who ignores reproof goes astray." The word "ignore" (azab) means "forsake, leave behind, neglect." It describes an attitude toward something that holds no value in our eyes or something that we have no regard for. Act that way toward discipline and reproof, Solomon, declares, and you will go astray. Here he uses a term (taath) that means "to stagger (like a drunkard)." Have you ever seen a drunk man trying to walk? He cannot maintain a steady straight pace no matter how hard he tries. He stumbles and bumps into things and falls down. That's what you're like, Solomon says, if you don't want to be held accountable and refuse to receive correction. You think you have it all together, but you actually look like a drunk stumbling down the road.

The way of a fool is right in his own eyes,

but a wise man is he who listens to counsel.

(Pro. 12:15)

This is a great verse. It's another one that puts it all in perspective in just a few words. We considered this verse when talking about how we are to view ourselves before God. I'll quickly point out that Solomon warns us that we all think we know what is best, we all think we have life figured out, we all tend to trust our own perceptions and opinions without question--but we do this, we are fools. We need to realize what God tells us so plainly and that is that we need discipline, we need correction, and we need instruction. We are not born with discernment, we are not born with wisdom. These qualities must be acquired. And one of the most elementary sources of discernment and wisdom is the correction we receive from others when we make ourselves accountable.

A rebuke goes deeper into one who has understanding

than a hundred blows into a fool.

(Pro. 17:10)

What will make the deepest impression on you, a word of rebuke or being struck a hundred times? That's easy, you are thinking, of course I'm going to be affected a lot more by a hundred blows on my back than by a word or two of reproof. Really? If so, then you lack understanding. Solomon is speaking in terms of ultimate benefits. He says you can strike a fool a hundred times and still have a fool--not he's bruised and in pain, but he's still a fool. But, if you rebuke a man who has understanding, then that word is going to do more for him that those blows to the fool.

Obviously, the "understanding" to which Solomon refers is that which is involved in realizing the value of a rebuke and the necessity of correction. A person who will listen to words doesn't have to be struck. A person who knows he needs correction will take it when it is spoken and will not have to be beaten to reach a point of discernment. This verse alone should impress upon us the worth of making ourselves accountable to others so that when we are corrected, we receive it gratefully, and when we are reproved, we respond in humility.

Oil and perfume make the heart glad,

so a man's counsel is sweet to his friend.

(Pro. 27:9)

As we might expect, Solomon ties this matter of accountability to friendship. Based on our study of relationships recently, we know that true friendship is going to involve exactly what Solomon speaks of in the verses we've covered--and that is frank counsel. Look at how beautifully he presents this element of a true friendship. When you catch a pleasant fragrance, your heart is glad--that is, a simple thing like a pleasing aroma can make us happy. That's what your friend's counsel should be like to you, Solomon says. A true friend is going to speak to you regarding faults in your life and when he does, you should be glad; you should receive his words as if they are a sweet-smelling scent that bring joy to the heart.

I would imagine that most of us would have to say that we have few friends that could be categorized in such a manner. And it's not always the fault of our friends. It's usually our fault because we won't receive their correction and get offended when they speak to us. Consequently, these days, I think having the kind of dedication it takes to be this kind of friend to another is a rare quality. Generally speaking, we aren't forthright people; we fear the reaction to what we say when we should fear most the consequences if we don't speak. But again, the burden rests primarily with the one receiving the counsel.

And that brings me to one final verse.

A man who hardens his neck after much reproof

will suddenly be broken beyond remedy.

(Pro. 29:1)

This is a shocking declaration from Solomon, but it brings into sharp focus what he says elsewhere. This matter of accountability is not a "take it or leave it" teaching in Scripture; it's not a advise that applies to everyone else but you. This is a serious subject. To lack accountability is not a beneficial position for any man or woman. We are sinners and we can be sure of one thing--our sin will manifest itself often even under the best of conditions. But there is more. Solomon speaks much about our attitude toward accountability. If we don't value the input of others or if we resist the counsel we are given or if we disregard the discipline spoken to us, we are in trouble. We will suffer for such foolishness. And in this verse, Solomon takes us to the end of that road some choose to travel, that road of dismissing the counsel of brothers and counting as unimportant the reproof of others. If we travel that road, if we insist on living as if our opinion is always correct and as if we are never in need of instruction, we are doomed.

Solomon describes a man who "hardens his neck after much reproof..." The phrase translated "hardens his neck" (two words are used: qashah and oreph) describes a man who steadfastly resists correction, who will not hear counsel, who will not admit that he is in need of change. This is a man who is too proud, too stubborn, too sure of himself to listen to others who have concerns about him. The idea is that this man is approached time after time, but stiffens against the efforts to correct him.

What happens to such a man? Does he just end up without friends after a while? That much is probably going to happen, but that's not what Solomon says: such a man "will suddenly be broken beyond remedy." Repeated resistance to God-honoring counsel, counsel grounded in concern for another, brings the man into a very dangerous place. Solomon says he will be "broken" and he uses a word (shabar) that means "to break down, to crush, to break in pieces." Here the meaning must be that this man's world falls apart because he refuses to accept this most primary of all means by which God advances our sanctification and gives us discernment and wisdom. A life built on the foundation of absolute confidence in self and rejection of counsel is a fragile life, indeed. Trouble is bound to come to the man who believes that he is above what Solomon teaches is a much-needed element in our lives.

The remainder of verses on the list I supplied to the congregation can be studied at your convenience:

Take hold of instruction; do not let go. Guard her, for she is your life. (Pro. 4:13)

For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching is light; and reproofs for discipline are the way of life... (Pro. 6:23)

Take my instruction and not silver, and knowledge rather than choicest gold. (Pro. 8:10)

Poverty and shame will come to him who neglects discipline, but he who regards reproof will be honored. (Pro. 13:18)

A fool rejects his father's discipline, but he who regards reproof is sensible. (Pro. 15:5)

He who neglects discipline despises himself, but he who listens to reproof acquires understanding. (Pro. 15:32)

Listen to counsel and accept discipline, that you may be wise the rest of your days. (Pro. 19:20)

Cease listening, my son, to discipline, and you will stray from the words of knowledge. (Pro. 19:27)

Better is open rebuke than love that is concealed. (Pro. 27:5)

The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child who gets his own way brings shame to his mother. (Pro. 29:15)

Practical Responses

In the matter of accountability, we should all admit and commit to one simple truth: we think we don't need it, but we need it desperately. Train yourself to be a person who welcomes counsel--you have the promise of the Word of God that your life will be blessed if you do. Don't let your flesh tell you that you don't need to be corrected or that your opinions are always right. Understand that discernment and wisdom come through the instruction we receive from one another. And take Solomon's warning seriously. Nothing brings turmoil into your life and the lives of others quickly than your stubborn refusal to humble yourself when reproved. Receiving counsel honors God and brings peace; refusing counsel dishonors Him and makes a mockery of what He tells us in Scripture.